March 11, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 1 Comment
Paul and his parents get chummy with George on Air Force Two
Call it the power of intention, the law of attraction or simply blessings…whatever it is, I’m sure reaping the benefits of it.
A year and half ago when I was toying with the idea of doing a book, I doubted I was even worthy of considering it. Now it’s months away from becoming a reality. Each step of the way, I’ve been amazed at all the opportunities and gifts coming my way.
Today I learned that I’ve been approved for a therapeutic mountain retreat for breast cancer survivors. It’s taking place in Park City, Utah, this summer. I found out about the wonderful organization that hosts it, Image Reborn, at the Young Survival Coaliton’s conference in Atlanta a couple of weeks ago.
There’ll be massages, makeovers, chef-prepared meals and fun with fellow survivors! They even fly you out there! They are a great organization and certainly deserving of support, so check out their site.
It has been my intention for a long time to finally explore some national parks out west, especially after seeing a recent PBS series on them. Mike and Chrissy will join me after the retreat, and we can do just that! I also hope I get to meet Evan Mattingly, one of the great people featured in my book. and maybe do some PR and a book signing.
I guess it’s kind of a “Make a Wish” trip for adults. Last night, Miracle Survivor Paul Falk came by with photos and memorabillia from his “wish trip” to Washington, DC, organized by Cincinnati Dreams Come True . More than 20 years ago, Paul, then 9, spent a lot of quality time with Vice President George H.W. Bush. I paged through his scrapbook containing notes Bush Sr. wrote to Paul and his family. And there were pictures like the one above taken by the official White House photographer.
Bush and Paul made a connection. Paul explains Bush took such an interest in Paul because he had lost a daughter to leukemia. It was his way of “paying it forward.” Paul says he’s excited he gets to do the same by sharing his remarkable story in my book.
We’ve heard of the book called, Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People. I think I’m going to write one called, Why Do Good Things Happen From Bad Things? I have plenty examples.
March 8, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 3 Comments
The gang from Saturday night dinner
Whew! I’m finally coming up for air after being out of town, then a solid week of editing my book.
I am still coming down from the excitement of attending the Young Women Affected by Breast Cancer conference. As a Pink Ribbon Girls scholarship recipient – and new board member – I have the task of sharing what I learned.
In a previous post, I shared my first day there. The second day was chock-full of information. The first keynote was a medical update from Julie R. Gralow, MD, from University of Washington School of Medicine and Seattle Cancer Care Alliance. She shared some hopeful developments, such as more targeted treatments for various cancers, especially HER2 nu and triple negative varieties.
As someone who’s neither (I’m ER/PR-positive), I found it a little disheartening that there wasn’t more for people like me, which make up the majority of breast cancer cases. She did share they have found a way to make Taxol and other drugs water-soluable, which would eliminate the need for anthihistimines or steroids and also make them more effective for metastatic patients. As someone who has suffered through the puffiness and insomnia of steroids, this was welcome news.
She talked a lot about trials for PARP inhibitors for triple negative cancers, which seemed promising. If proven effective, she predicted it could be approved for advanced breast cancer.
After Dr. Gralow, Pink Ribbon Girls (PRG) president, Tracie Metzger gave a brief presentation. All of the PRG contingent sat up front to support her. We were so proud! Then, Julie Rowland, PhD, Director of Cancer Survivorship at the National Cancer Institute, spoke on lifestyle factors related to breast cancer. A lot of her presentation seemed pretty obvious to me: good nutrition, exercise and stress management all improves quality of life and survivorship. What I found really fascinating though was that many of her recommendations mirrored the common attributes of survivors I interviewed for my book:
- Being an active participant in your care
- Relying on a support network
- Having a sense of purpose
- Seeing the positive gifts of cancer and living more fully
My final breakout session, Let’s Talk About Sex, was interesting. Why wouldn’t it be? Sharon Crews, a psychologist from Atlanta, talked about the struggles we survivors can face and how to overcome them. There was talk of vibrators and mindfullness meditation, using the mantra: “My body is alive and sexual.”
She was very clinical about all of it, but at several points, people got up and left. One woman admitted she left because she was uncomfortable and came back. After attending the PRG Pure Romance fundraiser Friday night, this all seemed very benign to me!
The night ended with a very fun and moving dinner with PRGs and other survivors we invited to join us. Andrea Bashor, our host for the evening, even invited the speaker Michael Baime, MD, who presented the Mindfulness Meditation breakout. He held up well, despite being the only male among almost 20 women!
It was a great time and I look forward to attending next year. For more information, visit www.youngsurvival.org
March 3, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 0 Comments
Jonny wears his T-shirt everywhere he goes to spread the word about Imerman Angels.
As I was saying in my previous post, I had a great time at the Young Women Affected by Breast Cancer conference this past weekend in Atlanta. I don’t think I’ve ever been anywhere with so many women in one place.
So imagine my surprise when I boarded the hotel shuttle and the first person I saw was a guy-Jonny Imerman. Jonny is one of the incredible survivors featured in my book. I first met him at the Annie Appleseed conference in January, but had heard a lot about his organization on the Internet. I’ve learned that Jonny is absolutely everywhere promoting his organization, which matches long-time survivor mentors to newly diagnosed individuals.
I teased him that he would be getting a lot of attention from all these young women at the conference. But Jonny is truly focused on his mission: to match individuals with someone the same age, gender and cancer. So no one has to fight it alone.
Diagnosed with testicular cancer at age 26, Jonny knows first-hand how difficult it is to find someone who understands. When his cancer returned in the lymph nodes near his spine, he had extensive surgery and learned it would take a while before he was out and at the gym again.
Although he had supportive family and friends, he could not find one other young testicular cancer survivor. When he recovered, he started recruiting long-term survivors to mentor other survivors, and Imerman Angels was born.
Now we have five full-time employees and more than 2,000 survivors in our worldwide network. We get really fired up; we want to do so much more. People try to brave it alone when they don’t have to. There are so many survivors out there who want to give back and inspire others. They have already been down the same road and are coming back to the starting line to help others get to the finish.
It’s important to get those positive stories out there. There’s a Lance Armstrong for every cancer, someone whose doctor said, “You’re not going to make it. You have maybe six months or a year.” Then years later, they are doing great. Our job is to get that Lance Armstrong hooked up with someone who has the same disease, and say “Here’s a guy who did it; you can do it, too.”
Our five-year goal is to have a match for everyone within 24 hours who is the same age, gender and cancer. There are lots of hugs and high-fives around our office. We get so excited when we match someone up. Our survivors are clearly changing people’s perspectives. That’s what gets us stoked and motivated: knowing we’re making a difference.
For more information, visit www.imermanangels.org.
March 1, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 3 Comments
My friend Jocelyn from Pink Ribbon Girls and I enjoyed dinner in Atlanta with almost 20 others Saturday night.
This weekend, I had the honor and privilege of attending the 10th Annual Conference for Young Women Affected by Breast Cancer in Atlanta. The event, sponsored by the Young Survival Coalition and Living Beyond Breast Cancer, attracted more than 900 women from around the nation.
My friend Ashley Oehler (who took this lovely picture) were among four recipients of the Pink Ribbon Girls’ (PRG) Anquionette Williams Memorial Scholarship. As you might remember, Anquionette was a friend and fellow PRG member who passed away this year. It was so fun hanging out with my PRG friends, seeing other people I’ve met both online and offline, and meeting so many other fabulous women there. Thanks to PRG for sponsoring my trip!! If you want to learn more about PRG, visit www.pinkribbongirls.org.
I have so much to share; it’ll take several posts to cover it. The first session I attended was “Creative Coping: Using Creative Arts to Heal Body, Mind and Soul.” The presenter Edna Bacon, an art therapist, began by talking about a Dr. Seuss book On Beyond Zebra, about creating your own letter of the alphabet. We were asked to tear up pieces of construction paper to create our own letter and share what it meant to us.
It was so powerful to hear women expressing themselves. There were tears and laughs. One very young woman used her piece to demonstrate all the ways she is different: being young with breast cancer, gay and deaf. Another woman spelled out the F-word to describe her relationship with cancer.
My creation evolved into a 3-D “letter”with pieces of paper sticking up all over the place. I shared that it represented how cancer has been an upward battle, but my life has been exploding with blessings. That includes getting to go to the conference, exciting developments with my book and my improving health and opportunities to contribute to that.
Another blessing was my first big piece of publicity for my book: a story in the Sunday edition of the Cincinnati Enquirer READ.
The talk at the conference reminds me of another Dr. Seuss book, The Places You’ll Go, which speaks to me these days and hope gives you boost, too:
You’ll look up and down streets. Look ‘em over with care.
About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.”
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you’re too smart to go down any not-so-good street.
And you may not find any
you’ll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you’ll head straight out of town.
It’s opener there
in the wide open air.
Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.
And then things start to happen,
don’t worry. Don’t stew.
Just go right along.
You’ll start happening too.
OH!
THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!
February 25, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 0 Comments
Me and Mike in Atlanta last month for my cousin's son's Bar Mitzvah. This weekend will be fun, minus the Torah readings.
I’m heading off for my girls’ weekend, Pink Ribbon Girls, that is. Thanks to my lovely group of gals for sponsoring me to go the Young Survival Coalition conference in Atlanta.
I’m looking forward to spending time with my buddies, as well as learning more about breast cancer research and issues. I’m really excited about doing some networking and meeting some of you I’ve met online.
If you’re there, look for me and say hi. I’ll be the short, dark-haired girl who’s giving her card to everyone she sees!
On another note, several people have asked me about how to purchase the book when it comes out. If you want to make sure you’re first to know, I’m starting a mailing list. Simply go to the contact page and let me know if you want to be on it. I’ll shoot you an email right away when the book is hot off the press!
See y’all later!
February 25, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 3 Comments
Heather Ray
As I write this, I am thinking of Heather Ray. I learned last night that Heather passed away. You might remember me mentioning Heather in previous posts. She was the beautiful, strong “miracle woman” who I saw in the chemo suite. She only had one leg (she lost one to bone cancer as a child) and aggressive breast cancer, but that didn’t stop her.
If you live in Cincinnati, you might have seen her on billboards this fall, pictured with two teammates for her Susan G. Komen fundraiser, Spinning for a Cure. Yes, even with one leg, Heather spinned her way to top physical condition, raising thousands of dollars for breast cancer research while she was at it.
It seems like just yesterday I was gabbing with her in the chemo suite, looking at pictures of her beautiful daughters dressed up in Halloween costumes. But the last time I saw her, she was in a wheelchair and in terrible pain.
When I first met her, I asked if she would be in my book, but never heard back from her. In my eyes, she was a miracle survivor and always will be. She will be greatly missed.
At the same time, I am busily preparing for the release of my book this spring. I meet with Beth, my editor, on Monday and will soon send it off to the publisher to lay out. Amy, an Enquirer photographer came today to take my photo. And Peggy O’Farrell the reporter called to ask me more questions about my cancer journey. It was difficult to tell my story once again, but I felt good to be able to share the actions I’m taking to build a healthy future.
This all seems trite looking at Heather’s situation. But it seems more important than ever to spread the word through this book and blog. People need to know that there are many survivors out there who are beating the odds every day. I know I certanly need to hear these stories to balance out the bad news like I’ve received this past couple of days.
I called one of the incredible people in my book, Yvonne Cooper, today to express my frustration over seeing another beautiful young woman dying from this disease. She reminded me that I’m on a mission. Thanks for supporting me in carrying this mission out.
February 23, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 2 Comments
Getting the word out
Yesterday, I was feeling a little down for some reason. I think it’s because I wrote my last story for my book. Don’t get me wrong, I was thrilled to have it almost done, but it was a little bit of a let-down, too. It has been such a healing experience and honor to hear and help create these remarkable individuals’ stories. Luckily more stories are coming in through this blog, so I’ll have more to share with you here.
Today was totally different. I realized that now I have the freedom to promote the book. Being in public relations all my career, this is something that comes to me naturally. I get pretty stoked about it – so excuse my upcoming rambling.
I had a phone interview with Peggy O’Farrell, the health reporter from the Cincinnati Enquirer, and she is going to run a story about the book in Sunday’s paper! It will feature me and some of the local survivors who are featured in the book. It’s not often that I literally jump up and down with excitement, but today I did! I didn’t expect I’d have a publicity opportunity so soon.
In addition, I was contacted by a friend at our local chapter of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation to give a talk at Miami University next month. I will be sharing my experience with young women and the message of the importance of being proactive about breast health no matter what your age.
And I found out that some of my story will be weaved into a play featuring breast cancer survivor stories called Voices (AKA Boobs on Broadway). The play will premier in Washington DC this October. It won’t mention me per se’, but will include some details of my experience. I’m just happy that I was able to help (in a small way) a super project that will raise funds to help under-served women and cancer research.
Here’s the link that talks about the play: http://www.voicesbc.org/index.html. I hope to meet the producer when we go to Washington this spring and share more about the production in a future blog post.
My biggest thrill is the opportunity to share the message of hope and healing these stories convey with people who really need it. It’s not about me; it’s about the mission of this book. I’ll share the Enquirer article once it runs, but if you’re in town, make sure you check it out.
February 22, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 3 Comments
Yes, she is pulling a train! I'm happy if I can open a jar of applesauce!
A while back, I found the AARP video from Twitter showing cancer survivor Mary Jacobson pulling a plane. I knew I had to include Mary in my book. Here’s the link because you won’t believe it unless you see it: http://bulletin.aarp.org/yourworld/reinventing/articles/mary_jacobson.html
At 55, Mary holds the world’s Strongest Woman title in her age group. But back in 1995, she was shopping for a coffin and making arrangements for her daughter because doctors told her she had about a 5 percent of surviving. She was diagnosed with Adenocarcinoma, a rare cancer that attacked the glandular walls of her uterus. In fact, they doubted she would make it out of surgery. To make matters worse, her husband, a young Marine, left her after hearing the news.
She barely did survive, remaining in a coma for two years while doctors studied her case and treated her. When she woke up, she discovered she was cancer-freee, but she had gained 152 pounds from her treatments and sedentary state.
Her 11-year-old daughter pushed her to go to the gym every day. With the help and encouragment of her military buddies, she became hooked on weight lifting. She dropped the weight, added muscle, and began to compete around the nation. Today she pulls planes, trains and automobiles for organizations such as St. Jude’s Cancer Research Hospital and the Special Olympics.
Whenever I do a pull, I say, “God, you have my first step; I have the rest.” That’s my mission – to take that first step for those people who can’t. Even if I can’t pull it, I’m pulling it with all my heart.
It’s not a matter of how strong I am. I’m a normal, everyday woman. I was never athletic growing up. A lot of people look at me and say, “You don’t have muscles all over the place. You don’t look like a weight lifter.” I’ll tell them we’re all strong if you put our mind to it. I’ve heard of women who have lifted a car to save their own child.
The last words that I heard out of my daughter’s mouth before I went into surgery were, “Mom, I know I might not see you again, but you’re going to be the strongest mom in the world.”
She gave me the title, the Strongest Mom, before anyone called me the Strongest Woman. She was crying inside, saying goodbye to her mom. I remember those words and think that’s what kept me alive all that time. I’d say to myself, “I am the strongest mom, and I’m going to help other moms in the world. Hopefully something good will come out of this whole thing.”
I can live to the fullest as long as I can keep my hope and love for what I’m doing. I tell other cancer survivors, “Don’t be afraid there’s no tomorrow. You’re here today, and we’re going to live to the fullest. Don’t ever give up hope that you can do it.”
February 18, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 20 Comments
Here it is!
There’s something about having a book cover design that makes this all seem more real! Let’s just say it hasn’t been an easy task. I must have gone through 1,000 stock photos and a dozen design concepts before deciding on this one.
My heartfelt thanks goes out to Randall Reese, my designer. Randall also took the photo, which is from the top of a volcano in Belize. He was so patient and really worked with me to come up with something I feel truly captures my book’s essence.
I have one more story to write, then it’s off to my editor, Beth Franks. I feel so blessed to have a team who’s offering their services at a greatly reduced price – practically free, considering all the work they are putting into it!
Another reality check: I called Joesph Beth Booksellers yesterday to talk about the possibility of carrying my book and arranging a book event. I’m going to follow up with them on Friday. I’m still shooting for having the book released sometime in May if all goes as planned.
I can’t tell you how excited I am to see this come to fruition! I truly feel God has led me to do this and has brought wonderful people into my life to help make it happen.
Thanks to all of you who are following this blog and are supporting me along the way.
February 17, 2010 - Posted by tamilb - 3 Comments
Cathy holding husband Pat's hand while in labor with Johnathon. Photo by Joseph C. Garza.
Tomorrow is my “little” girl’s birthday. She will be 11, sniff, sniff! She always enjoys the time leading up to her birthday when I tell her stories of my pregnancy and labor. “At this time, 11 years ago, we were waiting for you to make your debut, but you weren’t ready yet. (she was five days late).”
I remember truly realizing what people mean when they call babies a miracle. Holding her in my arms, I couldn’t believe this beautiful, perfect child was ours.
Miracle Survivor Cathy Wolfe knows a thing or two about miracle births. I met Cathy at a Camp Kesem reunion this fall. Both our children attended this wonderful summer camp for kids with parents who have/had cancer. We chatted briefly about her amazing story, and I knew I had to share it in my book.
Cathy was early into the pregnancy with her second son Johnathon when she learned she had ovarian cancer. Her doctor told her she could only guarantee her survival if she immediately had a hysterectomy, thus terminating her much-wanted pregnancy.
Cathy had already gone through an agonizing miscarriage, and her greatest desire was to have a large family. She pleaded with her doctor to wait until the baby could be delivered prematurely. The doctor finally relented and Cathy embarked her perilous journey to save herself and her child.
I was unable to keep food down and survived on ice chips and water. The pain was unbearable. The tumors were getting so big that any fall or pressure could cause them to rupture. Dr. Soriero likened it to a dandelion. When you blow on the seeds; they go wherever they want. So I was confined to a wheelchair.
At almost 15 weeks, I couldn’t stand it any longer. I felt like I was dying. I was rushed to the hospital where I learned my body was starting to become toxic because the cysts were obstructing my bowel. I prayed, holding my rosary the whole time.
When my blood levels stabilized, they called Dr. Soriero to lead the surgery. During the procedure, she gently held my uterus with one hand while removing the tumors. That alone could have caused me to go immediately into labor. The smallest one was 22 centimeters, much larger than the fetus at that time.
About five and half hours later, I was back in my room. The first thing I said when I awoke was, “Baby?” Pat said “Yes.” Then I said, “Cancer?” And he said I’d have to ask the doctor. I knew my baby had survived and was so very happy.
Miraculously, I carried my son to term, delivering him on November 6, 1997. We named him Johnathan, and he was healthy and perfect. When he was born, Pat went over to him and said, “Welcome to our world. It’s OK, Mommy and Daddy are here.” At that moment, he reached his hands up to Pat’s face. What a beautiful moment!
Today, more than 10 years after her diagnosis, Cathy remains cancer-free. She now helps other women who are pregnant with cancer through an organization called Hope for Two, http://www.pregnantwithcancer.org/.
